Meltdowns...

Today was a good day because my son had a successful day at school and played VERY nicely and didn't have (what the teachers have named his *bad* days as) any *meltdowns*. I can't explain to anyone who knows me well enough what I go through on a daily basis. I'm still in the process of figuring this out with the school district, but at his last I.E.P. (Individualized Educational Plan), they had shortened his school day from 3 hours a day to 2 hours a day. My son has a habit of running off and not *holding on the rope* and staying with his class. If he sees a chance, my son will run for it. So, even though he is in school for only 2 hours a day, I sit and wonder if I'm going to get a call from the school because they've had to tell him *no* and whether or not he started swinging at the teachers or not or knocking things down because he's upset... is a daily and constant worry of mine. He had a bit of a *meltdown* on Monday, but has had a somewhat successful time for the remainder of the week, with 1 day left to go before he starts a 1-week holiday from school.

Well, to go back a bit further, my son is in the afternoon session at school. There is one boy (*X* as I'll call him) who my son goes to school with who is a bit of a bully. *X* can be aggressive, mean, meddlesome but most importantly he is a child with special needs, so I know that he has his own challenges (like my son) to overcome and just shy of being 4 yrs old, is as tall as my son who is 4 and already considered very tall for his age as it is, and is a SOLID kid. I really do like *X* b/c he's a kid, like my son, who has challenges to be addressed and worked on. Every day when I drop my son off @ school, *X* comes and greets me and shows me what latest character or logo he has on his shirt. I tie his shoes b/c when I go to the school, it seems that his shoe is almost always untied and he lets me tie his shoelaces so he doesn't trip.

Anyway...it almost seemed that every time they were out on the playground (as I had to accompany my son every day to the playground to try to prevent him from running off) *X* was targeting my son at school. I'd send my son to school every day with his baseball cap on. As soon as the class hit the playground a game would ensue. His classmate would immediately grab my son's hat and then run for it and keeping it away from my son. My son was VERY passive and my son NEVER had a problem with sharing. It was never an issue with him. He was always glad to share and if kids would take his toys, he'd find something else to play with. Well, the game with my son and his classmate escalated and I even caught *X*slug my son across the face. As a mother or parent, that's VERY difficult to witness someone harming your child! So, I just went over there and told them that hitting was NOT good and told *X* to go see the teacher's aides and *X* was put into time out. Then, my son started showing signs of aggression back, from what I believe was his way of defending himself. I, then, stopped sending my son to school w/ a hat. But then, *X* just found another item that my son had to take from him and turn it into a *game* of keeping it from my son.

It then turned out that *X* was switched from the morning session to the afternoon session, w/ my son. Right when that happened, I noticed my son's behavior changed at school and at homewith his younger sister. And the *meltdowns* at school began. I finally put two and two together and noticed that since *X* was switched, the dynamics b/t *X* and my son was a chaotic one. I talked to my son's teacher and just decided to bring up what I felt what was going on and if she could please keep an eye on the both of them and to please observe the interactions b/t them and what she felt. At first, of course, she seemed a bit cautious of my observations, but I think over the past few months, I believe that she is seeing what I saw. My son and *X* are BOTH great kids. They DO like each other, but they do have some dynamics going on and I was told that they (the teachers) keep the two of them apart during certain activities b/c, at times, it does get chaotic b/t the two of them, and was told recently that *X*'s behavior has seemed to have worsen after being switched to the aft. class with my son.

But...having said all this...today was a GOOD day for my son. His best friend wasn't at school today, and so my son settled for *X* and it was a successful day. They played very nicely together w/out any *meltdowns*.

There are other things going on today that I could have done w/out, but I'm surviving it. My main focus is my son and his successes in every day life. Today was a good and successful day, and that is what matters!!!

Until another day...