SOMETHING is always better than Nothing

I watched a snip-it of Larry King Live last night, in which the topic of discussion was *Autism*. A blurb was displaying at the bottom of the screen that says *1 in 94 boys* will be dx with Autism and that statistic of Autism will be that higher than cancer, AIDS (and a few more I can't remember). 1 in 94 boys! Last night, Toni Braxon (singer) and Gary Cole (actor from Office Space) both with children dx with Autism as well as Bill Cosby speaking out for next month's National Autism Awareness month. My hubby and I still thinking how we can raise the awareness, even is we can do something small b/c SOMETHING is always better than Nothing!!!!

HOW...WHY...COULD IT BE?

I recently read a post yesterday re: Mercury Poisoning in the immunization shots. Speculations have come and gone re: that Autism could be a result from certain immunizations.

I have NO substantial resources to back this up, but after talking to several doctors/psycholigist during this journey with my son...many (dr's/researchers) seem to be disregarding the vac. shots may have something to do w/ the rising #'s of autism, but w/ the stats being 1 in 150 kids will be dx'd w/ autism, there has to be a more viable answer than *it just happens*. Why all of a sudden this uprise? All I want is an answer. After this journey w/ my son, I lagged on my daughters vac's (which, btw, I'm caught up now with), but I was so distraught. I gained a mistrust in the dr's we met with.

Why is that in many cases, after age 2 that all of sudden, kids digress to exhibiting Autistic traits? Kids are on track developmentally, then all of a sudden become withdrawn? Kids are talking, then all of a sudden, age 2, what was once a healthy vocabulary at an age 2 level, now becomes a almost non-existent vocabulary and become withdrawn, but seem to be healthy othersise? What is interesting, is how some meds work on some kids, but not on others. We all react physiologically different to different meds. Wouldn't that somehow be the same for vac. shots? I'm not trained medically, of course, but I've pondered on this on many many nights.

My mother and father are from the Philippines and during their time growing up, they weren't privvy to the many vac shots that we have now. They survived, they're living, and otherwise, healthy!! What is the growing numbers of Autism in other countries? It seems VERY prevalant here in the U.S., but what about other countries? Do they have these same statistics? Are our children being victims for unnecessary vac shots?

I just would like SOME answer as to why? Parents who are going through this same journey deserve some answer, relief, weight lifted up from their heavy hearts.




Thx again!

My King, My Hero, My Guy....

Today was a GREAT day! I'm all tuckered out, but still riding high from a great day.

Today was my son's dentist appointment. I blogged last week of his first check up. But today's appointment was for a first set of x-rays as well as his first cleaning! Let me tell you, I didn't know WHAT I was to expect. Usually in new settings, my son is ALL over the place. He gets really excited and wants to explore every nook and cranny in a new environment.

Well, we got to the office and checked in and he was AWESOME. We grabbed the Disney magazine and my son carefully examined each page and said aloud each Disney character he recognized. He sat the whole time until we were called in for our turn. The dentist greeted us and told us what he would be doing in today's visit, and what I REALLY liked was that he talked to me, as a parent, as to what I should expect, and the concerns I had and was just an overall GREAT guy. He really had a GREAT take on special needs children, and while listening to the parent, also assured us how he and his assts would be and that of course, that we get him in for his cleaning awake, not sedated and to, of course, be accustomed to seeing a dentist regularly, w/out the aid of a papoose and most importantly w/out sedating!

First, the x-rays. He was apprehensive about going with the dr. to the x-ray room, but willingly went along and let the dr. prop him up on the chair to put the vest on and everything. My son was getting scared when they were sticking in the x-ray bite in, so the first x-ray pic didn't take. So, the dr. tried again and was successful. By the time the dr. got to take the third x-ray, my son was helping the dr. put it in!! So...whew!!!!

We were then told to go into the room where they did the cleaning. When I walked in, they had the papoose laid out in the event should my son start becoming agitated and flailing his arms and the whole bit (since this particular dentist office did not sedate their patients). I, and the dental assts got my son to lay down and I was able to sit with my son on the chair. I told him that he was going to be okay and then asked if he wanted to hold my hands. He immediately said "yet" b/c he can't say his *S's* yet, so he put out his hands and I held them ever so tightly. They put on a pair of sunglasses on him so that the big light wouldn't bother him. And, they started to go to work! What a TROOPER! I was SO proud of him!! He didn't fuss at all. He was a little scared but we all kept giving him MUCH praise and told him what a GREAT job he was doing!!! The dental visit couldn't have gone any more perfect!! I admit, I was REALLY nervous about the appointment b/c I just didn't know how he'd do, and he was just absolutely perfect. Even before they were going to polish the fluoride on, the asst asked how he does with loud sounds, I said he does perfectly well, but if they could, maybe run the polishing drill by his hand, or even let his finger touch it so he would know where the sound was coming from. And, she did, and again, perfect! It was just an AWESOME day!!! He's my hero. Just goes to show...always give your kids the benefit of the doubt b/c they do excel and surprise us more times than we give them credit for.

GREAT day FOR SURE!!!!!

Say No to Crack

OK, I'm sure this will be the last post for the day, but my son has become fascinated by cracking eggs. He had 3 eggs this morning. He watches me get breakfast ready every morning, if he's not otherwise distracted by Curious George, but today after breakfast, he went in the fridge and pulled out 3 more eggs. NOT to eat them, but to crack them. I cooked them, thinking he was hungry. He wasn't. He didn't want to eat them, just wanted to crack them. He tried again this afternoon. I need to hide the eggs.

NO THANK YOU!!

My son stayed home this whole week due to a bad sty he had developed. He had big meltdowns all the previous week and I just didn't want it to get worse or (sorry to get gross) have the sty break from crying and rubbing his eyes. Part of keeping home was the sty, but the other part was just the anxiety I'd been having with his meltdowns at school. So many transitions coming up, I'm having a tough time with them. In any case, it's been real nice having him home.

So, Friday is our *Pizza Day* in our household. As we were driving to get pizza, my son kept saying his best friend's name and pointing in the direction of the school. He kept saying "No pizza. No want Pizza. Want K*". I kept saying, "C'mon bud, it's pizza day. Don't you want pizza?" My son kept saying "no thank you, no pizza. want K*". One of his goals from his IEP is to develop more expressive language. Hey, it doesn't get ANY better than that! Ok, so he didn't talk in a *complete* sentence, but he expressed that he didn't want something and in turn, said what he DID want, which was his best friend. I admit, I cried in the car b/c it was such an accomplishment. I'm proud of him.

We've also encountered a slight glitch in his transportation, but I'm not going to let that bring my day down. It's already been a mediocre one at that, but that car ride earlier was such a treat.

A Rant is a Rant...

I'm tired again. I feel borderline okay/down. The sun is out, starting to get warm, and I still feel like *blah*. I've been longing for Daylight Savings, and now that it's here, I don't know how to feel. Things are falling into place, but I guess today is an off day for me. Kids are great, all in good moods. This is the up/down roller coaster of emotions I go through. On top of that, my hubby has been working very hard, getting home late, so we don't get to catch up when he gets home. We're both tired at the end of the day. Glad today is Friday so we can start the weekend. Just thought I'd blog out whatever angst I've got inside and hopefully I can get the day started on the right foot.

Ciao for now...

What happens from here?

Ok, I'm on a roll with the blog thing, but something has been eating at me so feverishly these past few weeks now and I finally am able to put it into words.

As every one has been noticing in the media, that there is the sudden hype, reports, articles, what-have-you, on Autism. The statistics now show that what was once *1 in every 166* kids, have gone down to *1 in every 150* kids to be diagnosed with Autism. SO WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? This sudden increase and influx of kids diagnosed with Autism/PDD/Aspergers, where does that leave us (parents and kids)? What is going on here?

Yes, there are special schools that are specifically designed for those diagnosed with Autism, but how can the average-joe parent afford it? I know that *I* can't afford it. So, my son is in special education day school, provided by the public school system. That's not a problem. I am GRATEFUL that he does have these services. However, with all of these new cases of Autism coming out, what does that mean for our special education classes? While teachers have gone thru college, getting their degrees in Special Education, it sounds too generalized for the public school system. Although I appreciate and value my son's teachers and teachers aides, they are not current with all facets of the autism spectrum. They are not aware that a child who may be autistic can exhibit traits of AD/HD and or feel like they're Oppositional Defiant. It's just another label the teachers give the kids, making us parents feel like failures. There is NOT a perfect *test* to assess for Autism. It's such a wide spectrum, but they narrow it down if the child exhibits at least 3 of the characteristics. I'm NOT knocking down the special education teachers, but I think with this influx of cases, what does that mean? It sounds like there will be an influx more students into Special Education? Does that mean that with all these children being diagnosed with Autism, that the resources and therapies will be more costly to parents who can not, in a sense, afford it? A new legislation was signed for more extensive research, but where does that leave us parents?

My son was in a class with more serious cases of Autism. He didn't fit in, b/c he was too social, but lacked the speech. He's in a class now, but he can't seem to follow the structure. He's stuck in b/t. What is it I'm supposed to do? I want to find something that is more appropriate for him, but if we can't afford a special school for him, what do we do? I don't want to hear *well, if you can't take care of your kids, you shouldn't have had them*. That's a moronic thing to say. These kids didn't ASK to be born with special needs. They're here, so what do we do?

I was watching the news this morning how more teachers are quitting due to violent and aggressive students in the classroom. A 14 year old student broke her teachers neck. WHAT IS UP WITH THAT?? Could it be that the United States insists that with our economy, it's necessary to have a dual income household. And, that the average person does not necessarily work 40 hours a week, but we're feeling the pressure to put in 50 to 60 hours a week just to catch up on everything. And more so, while both parents are working excessive hours a week to survive and support themselves and their families, where are the children? At daycares or whatnot. In the report, they mentioned that this new generation lacks the discipline and the respect for authoritative figures. Why is that? Because the parents have to WORK!! What happened to teaching kids the simple act of saying "Thank you" and "Please" and to "Not Talk Back to your elders". I got a good ol' spanking when I was disrespectful to any of my elders. Not only do we not have the time to teach our kids these simple, yet important lessons in life, when we're so tired from a long day at work, not to mention dealing with a commute as well, we also lack the patience.

Please forgive me, I'm NOT speaking for ALL parents, but I am speaking for SOME parents, who I DO hope know where I am coming from. I don't believe I'm TOO off the mark. So please, enlighten me, someone, please? What is our children's future to be like?

(Drum Roll Please)....The IEP that is a Success!!

Today was my son's *emergency IEP* and with much trepidation, I just wasn't quite sure what the outcome would be. But, I would have to say that it was very much a success and had a very positive outcome.

The items to be addressed were a) transportation b) 1 on 1 aid c) current needs and d) the 2007-2008 school year.

The *transportation part was a breeze. All the *i's* were dotted, and all the *t's* crossed, so we were good to go. Just waiting for the gal fr: the Trans. Dept. from the district to call!

Re: an *1 on 1 aid* was resolved by being able to have met at a happy medium. Although the 1-on-1 aid was my idea, the district was able to meet me and my son's teachers half way by given the approval for an additional aide to assist within the classroom for 2 hrs/every day. It surely didn't hurt to ask! So...I asked and we were able to meet at a place where the district could assist with current needs while putting some ease on my mind. I also thought I might ask if it would be out of the question to have a male aide be available. I certainly don't want to have any issues with gender discrimination, but I thought it might be helpful to have a male figure in the classroom. Again, it didn't hurt to ask. It was written in the addendum to the IEP, and we'll certainly see what the outcome is.

The behavioral issue/plan was reviewed and re-evaluated as having not been successful, and so the behavioral plan will be further assessed with the districts behavioral team and will hopefully have the team come in and come up with a more effective plan.

Last, but not least, the 2007-2008 school year was brought up. My son will continue on to special education. At first, I think my son's teacher and the district Resource Specialist (D.S.R.) seemed a bit nervous bringing it up, but I immediately put their minds to rest and right away mentioned that I certainly did not want to mainstream my son if he was not ready. My belief is, if I mainstreamed my son when he wasn't ready, I would NEVER want my son to feel as though he failed us, when in reality, it was US who failed him. My hubby and I are VERY comfortable that our son will be in special ed just a while longer. He needs to work on the structure and the skills in order to mainstream and however long that takes, we'll be there supporting him 100% of the way.

I am VERY thankful as to how the IEP turned out. My son's teacher and the D.R.S., in return, had very nice things to say to me in re: of my attitude and open mind with my son's school experiences and challenges and having been working together as a team together. I believe that if we, as parents, are able to work cohesively together (and we're fortunate if parents and our children's teachers have a good working relationship), it'll benefit all of us. After all, aside from us (parents), the teachers see our children a lot as well. One thing I learned from a PHP staff member at a recent meeting was, *Never Burn Your Bridges w/ ANYONE*. It's TRUE. You just NEVER know when you might need to use that person as a resource again. We, as parents, need to FIGHT for our children's rights in school, but fight the RIGHT fight, not just *to* fight.

I'm feeling much more at ease and what it comes down to is, my son's success. And, w e just need to find those right tools to help him down that road of success.

Until another day...

SAY "AAAHHHHHHH"

Good news. We found a pediatric dentist who also happens see children who have special needs. Anywhere from mental retardation to AD/HD to Autism Whew!! Good news!

Even more so...he and his staff were excellent!! I couldn't have been more pleased!!! He told me that we did a GREAT thing by bringing our son in now and to get him familiar with getting his teeth cleaned w/out the aid of sedating. His particular office did not sedate their patients, but that's GREAT! It's important for kids this young not to be sedated b/c a) it could potentially be dangerous b) I don't want him to have to rely that every visit will be a sedated one.

At first, my son was scared, but we finally got him into a position where the dentist was able to perform an examination. The dr.'s asst was awesome, and you could just tell that they both have the expertise to handle my VERY active son. I didn't get any disapproving looks from my son's behavior. The dr was genuinely more concerned with starting my son in the habit of becoming comfortable at a dentist office. He said that if we didn't start when we did, that as an adult, there would be a bigger problem w/ dental visits and getting him to go, and the dr was right!

Anyway, no cavities. YAY! It could be b/c my son doesn't really like candy, so we're fortunate in that respect. So, we're going in next week to get his teeth cleaned. YAY! Wish us luck!

Smile, what's the use of crying?

For some reason, I was humming this tune this morning. What an appropriate song to go describe my feelings about the experiences I have. I hope that this song comforts other parents as well!!!


Smile ~
(Nat King Cole/Words by John turner & Geoffrey Parsons and music by Charlie Chaplin

Smile though your heart is aching
Smile even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by
If you smile through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll see the sun come shining through for you

Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile


That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile

Meet Me at CafeMom!

So, I attended a support group last Thurs. Needless to say, it was also the last one the host would be hosting one. So, my husband and I are discussing the possibility of hosting one. It's so important for myself and for other parents to physically meet each other and vent. Keep you posted on this!!

However, on the bright side, I ran into a site, CafeMom.com which is a *MySpace* for moms, which have different groups. I was able to link up to the PDD/Aspergers/Autism group. For the FIRST time, I was able to feel like I was *home*. I'm tired of reading information on the web and it WAS/IS refreshing to read/hear experiences from other moms, and from strangers to boot! My personal friends, my gal pals, as I like to refer them to, are a GOD-SEND, but at the same time, it's difficult for some of them to relate to the experiences that I have. Thank you to the ladies I've been able to connect and chat with. You, too, are a God-send. Pls forgive me if some of you are put off w/ my reference to God. I do not like to push my religious affiliation on to anyone. So, you are all a *higher presence-send* to me.

Lately, I've been feeling like I've been on a roller coaster of emotions. One moment I can be feeling great and positive. Two seconds later, I'm in doubt and distressed. It's AWFUL! It's not about to get easier, challenging days ahead, but I'm trying to be optimistic and praying the better days outweigh the challenging days.

On a brighter note...my son's speech has been increasing! Weird enough to mention is that 3 weeks ago, we started my son on multi-vitamins, Flinstone Gummy Bears. Now, by MY views, he's a picky eater. Chicken nuggets, cheese pizza, bananas, eggs, waffles, chips, crackers, Jack in the Box Breakfast Jacks and J/B Chicken Sandwiches are his main staple of foods. I'm sure I'm forgetting something, but in a nutshell, that's what he eats. As a parent, I feel GUILTY for giving him those foods, but if he eats, then I'm satisfied. So, LUCKILY, he took a liking to the multi-vitamins b/c it resembles candy! (We tell him every day to take his *candy* and thankfully, it's worked). Since he's been taking his vitamins, his speech has increased. Even talking in 4 to 5 word sentences. For him, that's a definite accomplishment. He's becoming more expressive and letting us know what he wants/needs. We're on the road to success with bumpy hills ahead. That's ok. Everything and every one is a work in progress, right?

Until another day...

Go Home!

It's been a while since my last post, but wanted to share.

My son has had some challenging days lately. Some transitions are coming up in the near future, but I'll save that for another blog. As I picked him up from school yesterday, my son was being somewhat resistant to leaving class. I was getting his backpack ready, and he came up to me and said, "Mommy, go home?". Ok, so my son may be 4 yrs old, but for someone who is speech delayed, it was a MAJOR accomplishment. It was fantastic. I was ecstatic and my eyes ALMOST filled with tears. I didn't want my son to get a mixed message from me, but I hugged him so tight and told him "Great job. Great sentence." Other than not being a not-so-perfect day at school, turned out a great day none-the-less.

Also, last night I attended my first Autism Support Group in a neighboring town/city. Needless to say, I also happened to had attended the last one that the host was putting on. So, again, it's back to square one trying to find a local one. Looks like I may have to start one on my own.

Until another day.